Posts by Bumble Bee

29

Is spiritual compatibility important?

by serendipity in

how important is/was spirituality to you when considering a person as a husband/wife?

did you expect the person to have similar spiritual beliefs and goals?

if s/he didn't have similar beliefs, was it important to be able to discuss spirituality respectfully ?

Bumble Bee

Well, when I met my future hubby, we were both JW and you know you are not supposed to marry outside the "religion". At the time we had spiritual compatibility - both born and raised JW's, did not question "mother", it was all we'd ever known.

The problem arises when things change down the road. This can happen with any religion or belief system. If there wasn't a good relationship outside of the "spiritual" component, when that changes there can be problems.

If you love the person for what they are, not what they believe in, I think you can work around the differences.

It's what I'm hoping for in my situation.

BB

64

To Those Who Still Go To Meetings, Do You Sense Anything Different?

by minimus in

jw
friends

are people excited by anything in the organization?

are they tired?

mostly missing?

Bumble Bee

I haven't been to my hall in some time (years), but I know they had to bring over two elders from another cong in the city because our cong didn't have enough. In the last 5 years they have changed the boundaries twice and dissolved one cong to boost the numbers. Not sure where things are now though.

BB

16

Does the average JW feel the "end is near"?

by Bumble Bee in

jw
friends

my hubby recently had a discussion with his older brother.

my brother in law told him he wants to reach out to become a ms. he's going to cut down on his work schedule, go out in service more, spend more time with his son etc.

he's in his mid forties, has always been regular at meetings and fs, but never aspired to reach out before.

Bumble Bee

My hubby recently had a discussion with his older brother. My brother in law told him he wants to reach out to become a MS. He's going to cut down on his work schedule, go out in service more, spend more time with his son etc. He's in his mid forties, has always been regular at meetings and FS, but never aspired to reach out before. I asked why now? He says the time left is short that this world is going to end soon and he feels this is what he should be doing.

He has a pretty good idea about our inactivity. He questioned my hubby about this abit too. We are the guardians of his son if anything should ever happen to them, and wanted to know if we'd "take care of ****" I asked hubby what he meant by that - he said would we raise **** "in the truth?"

I never thought of that before! I have to come up with a good answer to that one. Any suggestions?

16

Apostate music

by Bumble Bee in

jw
friends

as a jw kid, i was always hearing about not listening to certain music.

one reason my mother called me apostate is because she saw some cd's i had - she called it gospel.

some of them were decidedly what is termed "chrisitan" music in the store, some are crossover artists (chrisitian but played on mainstream/top 40 radio) and there is alot of country music that is spiritual for lack of a better word.. i was always under the impression that "unapproved" music would be songs with lyrics that go against biblical principals - sex, drugs, etc, not music that promotes good things in life, or glorifiying god and jesus.

Bumble Bee

mrsjones5, I would disagree with you slightly. Gospel music (much of which I like) would be considered from false religion and therefore apostate, even if the lyrics did not contradict JW teaching. Other types of music like R&B and good ole Rock and Roll are simply worldly and depending on the lyrics perhaps demonic (demonic is a word that says it all...)

Ok, but what if this music isn't affiliated with any religious group? Most of what I have is music that you can listen to on the radio. (Not all of it, but ususally the main song could be listened to on the radio.) Is it still considered apostate? Like you said, even if the lyrics do not contradict JW teaching, isn't this kind of music better than the so called "demonic" music?

19

How can she pick and choose who she wants to shun?

by Bumble Bee in

recently my mother and sister have cut me out of their lives.

they made it quite clear that they don't want anything to do with me anymore, my mother going so far as to change her will (not that there was much there anyways).. i have not da, am not df, have never said anything to anyone in my family about my doubts or what i have uncovered about this religion, i just stopped going to meetings.

(i usually go to the dc with her, and some ca, and the memorial at her cong.).

Bumble Bee

Bumble Bee, some people are just plain cold and unforgiving. I have faced this same situation for years (I’m active and go to meetings to boot) from one of my daughters and her husband. Try not to let it bother you since you can’t control other people and thy will have to answer to God the same as everybody else. Also, rise above your hurt feelings and don’t repay evil for evil.

Fairmind, Yes, she has had problems with forgiving. I've tried to talk to both her and my sister about this - they always say "I'm never going to forgive so and so for doing that". I asked how they thought God was going to forgive them if they don't forgive others? She often says "I know Jehovah will forgive me for this." She is assured that everything she does, it's ok, she'll be forgiven. As far as repaying evil for evil, I'm not the one casting the first stone. If you are going to point a finger at someone, you'd better be prepared to have three pointing back at you. I'm not sure how to put it that I am not trying to justify things, so I think I'll just leave it at that. Thanks for your advice, I know we sometimes do rash things in the heat of the moment. BB

19

How can she pick and choose who she wants to shun?

by Bumble Bee in

recently my mother and sister have cut me out of their lives.

they made it quite clear that they don't want anything to do with me anymore, my mother going so far as to change her will (not that there was much there anyways).. i have not da, am not df, have never said anything to anyone in my family about my doubts or what i have uncovered about this religion, i just stopped going to meetings.

(i usually go to the dc with her, and some ca, and the memorial at her cong.).

Bumble Bee

What kind of relationship do you have w/mom and sis apart from the religion? Juni

Sounds to me like your mom and sis treat you as my mom and sis do to me. ; I was very emotionally abused as a child by my mom. ; Tried to confront her w/letters and my sis just got angry w/me for hurting mom's feelings. ; Of course mom does everything for sis. I have a brother who also treats mom like crap. ; But they are in her favor. ; It's a control thing - only if you allow it will it continue. ; The only way to stop it is to stop the game playing and set your boundaries. ; Make up your mind as to what you think you want to live with. ; Juni

Hi Juni, I thought I had a good relationship, but when I really started to think about it after all that was said by them, I realized how one sided the relationship really was. My sister has reacted the same way yours did, she gets so mad/angry with anyone who she thinks hurts mom - mom can fight her own battles, this had nothing to do with her. I would have to say I suffered emotional abuse as well. This is acutally my step mother (since I was 3 yrs old so she is the only mother I remember/know). When she was mad at me about anything she'd pull out the "I'm so glad I'm not your mother". She knew that would hurt me. I told her she does not have the power to hurt me anymore. If she decides to change her mind about what she has done, there will have to be boundaries set up - there was a very good post about boundaries on here a while back, I'll have to find it again. BB

8

A Safe Natural Way to Feel Better!

by SWALKER in

do you have feelings of inadequacy?

do you suffer from shyness?.

do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?.

Bumble Bee

My hubby says that Jose guy is a bad, bad man!

For me it's gin.

BB

16

Apostate music

by Bumble Bee in

jw
friends

as a jw kid, i was always hearing about not listening to certain music.

one reason my mother called me apostate is because she saw some cd's i had - she called it gospel.

some of them were decidedly what is termed "chrisitan" music in the store, some are crossover artists (chrisitian but played on mainstream/top 40 radio) and there is alot of country music that is spiritual for lack of a better word.. i was always under the impression that "unapproved" music would be songs with lyrics that go against biblical principals - sex, drugs, etc, not music that promotes good things in life, or glorifiying god and jesus.

Bumble Bee

As a JW kid, I was always hearing about not listening to certain music.

One reason my mother called me apostate is because she saw some CD's I had - she called it Gospel. Some of them were decidedly what is termed "Chrisitan" music in the store, some are crossover artists (Chrisitian but played on mainstream/top 40 radio) and there is alot of country music that is spiritual for lack of a better word.

I was always under the impression that "unapproved" music would be songs with lyrics that go against biblical principals - sex, drugs, etc, not music that promotes good things in life, or glorifiying God and Jesus. Does not the bible say to worship with music?

Is this something that if she went to the elders about my now being an "apostate" that could cause problems?

BB

19

How can she pick and choose who she wants to shun?

by Bumble Bee in

recently my mother and sister have cut me out of their lives.

they made it quite clear that they don't want anything to do with me anymore, my mother going so far as to change her will (not that there was much there anyways).. i have not da, am not df, have never said anything to anyone in my family about my doubts or what i have uncovered about this religion, i just stopped going to meetings.

(i usually go to the dc with her, and some ca, and the memorial at her cong.).

Bumble Bee

Thanks for your responses.

I should send her an email regarding this. I just sent one today addressing some things she said. I've been sharing all this with my brother - he's the one that brought up her association with my aunt. We've always been around her even as children just after she was df'd, so I really don't consider her in that way. He also told me about her helping my uncle with his parole. I really stressed to him about stepping in and not allowing this, especially with my neice so close. He's not sure what he's going to do yet (he's made an apartment in his house for her, so technically as her landlord, I think he could prevent it from happening).

He tried to talk to her today, but she's not the easiest person to talk to, she gets angry and nasty, and he has his own problems with her.

I'm going to see if she responds to my last email, and take it from there. She's called me apostate already, so if she persues things with the elders, I have a few things to tell them about her.

BB

46

Do you kiss your dog?

by AK - Jeff in

jw
friends

.

and is it just a peck or a nice wet one on the nose?.

jeff [of the i am bored tonight class]

Bumble Bee

Mastadon

What a cutie you have there! If I knew how to post a pic, I'd post my two doggies!

BB